Choice

Days right now are gray, dark, gloomy and I feel somewhat the same in my spirit : Not much energy, blah, not wanting to do anything.  As I beseech the Lord for help to overcome this gloominess God actually reminded me of one verse: Psalm 118:24 -
This is the day that The Lord has made; we will rejoice and be glad in it.
This verse was shown to me by my Mother in law/love.  She used to remind her children of it when she got them up in the morning.

As I pick the verse apart I see 1. A true statement to acknowledge and be conscious of and 2. A decision to act according to the statement.  You could say it points out God’s will and what my will should be.

It is God’s will for the weather and events of this day to be as they are - it is the day HE made.  The Psalmist made a willing choice to rejoice and to be happy about it.

Likewise I can acknowledge that this day is God’s determination- He chose what it is and will be.  And I can choose how I will be during this day.  Will I point my thoughts to the gloominess of it, (and it already has brought sad news) or will I rejoice in the goodness of it.  I am soooo blessed by so many things and people in my life.  I know I am going to Heaven because God sent His only begotten Son to die for me.  If today is the worst day of my life I can choose to rejoice.  That can be a hard choice but it IS a choice.  Note the verb in the second part of the verse: will.  I hope this is not the worst day of my life but I ask God to help me with my choice to obey the teaching of the verse; rejoice and be glad in it.  I also know that God will help me to have the attitude of rejoicing and gladness.  I am uplifted by this promise:
Isaiah 35;10 - And the ransomed of the Lord shall return, and come to Zion with songs and everlasting joy upon their heads: they shall obtain joy and gladness, and sorrow and sighing shall flee away.
And another promise says in John 16:22 - And ye now therefore have sorrow:  but I will see you again, and your heart shall rejoice, and your joy no man taketh from you.

Yes it is gray and gloomy today with clouds in the sky but it IS the day The Lord has made. I know sunny days will come and more gloomy ones.  I also know a glad eternity is promised to me.  For today I will rejoice in this day God has made.

Aquatinted with Greif

Right now it is slightly past one month since my son in love/law passed into the presence of God at the age of 44 years.  I have seen the passing of my parents, feather in law, nephew, friends and even lost one pregnancy.  It seems that grief for family and friends is different each time.  The loss of my daughters husband and my grandchildren’s father seems even more unlike and yet similar to other losses.  Grief has paid another visit.  I don’t like his visits but I am told it is normal and necessary to endure.

Marjournal Notes: The Race

Marjournal Notes: The Race

The Race

The Race
By Marjorie Meinzinger
9/30/10

I am running a race
The track is so long.
It seems I can no longer breath
I fall in the lane;
I cannot get up
Through the din I hear a sweet song:

Come unto me, my arms are stretched wide;
Soon you cross over the line.
You have my strength; You have my joy.
Run child, you truly are mine.

So I look through the haze
At His smiling face,
I struggle but finally rise.
I stand on my feet
And hear from the line
My child, run on, win the prize.

I know on my back
A bundle is tied.
The burden is slowing my pace.
I hear from my coach
And friends cheering there,
Run, lay the burden aside.

I come to a hill.
Sweat stings my eyes.
I barely keep going one step.
My friends and my coach
Cheer on loud and clear,
Run on and you’ll take the prize.

Come unto me, my arms are stretched wide;
Soon you'll cross over the line.
You have my strength; You have my joy.
Run child, you truly are mine.

I am thirsty and tired
But the line is quite near.
A kind one hands me a drink
I take step after step
And cross over the line
To the One who is truly most dear.
I am handed the prize.
It is jeweled gold and bright.
It sparkles, it glitters, it gleams.
But I lay it down
At the feet of The One
Who is The Way, The Truth and The Light.

Come unto me, my arms are stretched wide;
Soon you cross over the line.
You have my strength; You have my joy.
Run child, you truly are mine.

Marjournal Notes: Lunch Money

Marjournal Notes: Lunch Money

Attention

This has been my best year for plants.  I usually kill them all.  Yet this year they are filled out, green and beautiful.  Today my Orange tree got planted.  I'm so excited to watch it grow.  But why are my plants thriving FINALLY this year?  One easy answer: ATTENTION!  I have watered them, rotated them, fed them and with some repotted them.

I think that's what keeps many things, plans and aspirations going.  It's paying attention.  Paying attention keeps friendships alive.  Paying attention helps our health.  Paying attention keeps us safe on the road.

What do I need to pay attention to?  So much! So much!  Perhaps the thing to pay attention to the most is my walk with God.  Is HE important?  How much do I listen to Him?  How much do I leave with Him before tackling things alone?

Yes, I need to pay attention to The One who loves me.  Like my plants paying aaattention to God will help me grow and thrive better than anything.

Snow Day

Softly and quietly light snow flakes float down onto the outside surfaces of my home.  Earlier the flakes had come down faster and heavier.  The trees outside in the back are outlined in white and create a beautiful feast for my eyes.  I actually enjoy the brightness because of my deep dislike for grayness and darkness  Yet, with all the enjoyment visually I grimace at this weather type because of the cold I do not like, because of the slippery and sloppy roads.  I need to go out and I am delaying because I do not enjoy driving in this.  My grandson who does not drive must get to his job on a moped.  This makes me feel concerned for his safety yet he needs to go.

I sometimes think  that it is simply Winter that I dislike.  Again, I hate dark days, gloominess and cold.  I know one of my brothers detests cold.  (There is a reason but that is another story.). I detest the shorter days and the feeling of being trapped.  I hate wearing boots and coats.  And so I whine on about the weather.

My words to others echo back to me, " if you can't change it then move on and change what you can."  
Can I change the weather?  Some people think they can impact the weather but my belief is that God controls the weather and we can't do much about it at all.  We can manage how we treat the earth but ultimately God who created the sky, the seas, the plant and animal life and me is in control of the weather.

So as I was gazing on this beautiful soft stuff that I find so uncomfortable I had a question pop into my head.  What GOOD is snow? Are there things about this strange cold beautiful type of earthly matter that are good? God has all things planned out.  Why would He plan snow?

There IS the obvious : Kids ( of all ages)  like to play in it.  Skating, sledding, skiing and building snow forts and  snow people come to mind immediately.  This isn't the answer that I was looking for.
But I did a little research ( by asking Siri) and found there really are good benefits to snow.  If you grow wheat snow helps keep your soil in good condition by helping to maintain the moisture in the ground as well as protecting soil from wind erosion.   This must be a benefit to farmers of all crops in Northern areas.  Another good thing about snow is that it insulates plants from the cold air and wind.   I could do a whole  dissertation on the scientific benefits of snow but since this is not a science lesson
I'll just do a summary.  Snow is a huge benefit to our earth.  We need it!

Did you ever use the phrase, " I don't NEED this? "  There are many little so called irritants and things that come into our lives that we think are a real pain in the neck.  But ARE these gripes for no
reason?

I wonder if some of the little problems are there for our insulation or to build us up and prevent erosion.  Did you ever notice how a piece of wood that is rubbed often becomes beautiful  as it is rubbed again and again.  Like snow adds moisture to soil does life's "bothers" add strength to our souls.  I think of the scrpture that says, " Thou therefore endure hardness, as a good solider of Jesus Christ." 2 Timothy 2:3.  I must endure some hard things in life.  I must soldier on.  When it snows I face it with my coat, hat, boots, scarf and gloves.  When life snows I put on my soldier gear and march on to the beat of Gods drum that keeps a perfect rhythm.  And I will be made strong as the snow enriches and protects the earth.

Now who would have thought that that beautiful white snow had so much written in it?

The Swimming Lesson

By Marjorie Meinzinger
The water in the motel pool was glistening and smelled like the usual chlorine treated pool. There were about twenty or so people playing in various places in the pool and a few more lounging in chairs and on towels around the edge of the pool as well. As I stood at the edge there were two things on my mind: cooling off from the heat of this summer day and showing off my newly acquired swimming skills. There were so many people in the pool and around the edge of it I was sure that someone would see me as I did the American crawl that I had learned at home in Michigan. Somewhere in my room was my little card that said I had successfully completed the beginners swimming course. I was going to prove to myself and all watching that I could swim.

I stroked and kicked from the shallow edge of the pool toward the rope that was stretched across the middle of the pool. I thought that in all pools the deep end started at the rope. My mother was sitting on one side of the pool in a lounge chair and my father stood somewhere on the other side of the pool. It was a beautiful day in Paris, Texas and we all were enjoying the luxury of a motel with a pool.

As I swam confidently toward the rope I began to feel tired. I did not want to stop showing off my skill so I kept swimming toward to the rope. When I reached the rope I put my feet down. There was no bottom. The pool bottom was designed differently than the pools I had been in before. The deepest part was in the middle where the rope was stretched across. I panicked. I forgot how to swim. As I bobbed to the surface of the water I screamed for help, thrashed my arms and kicked my feet to no avail.

An older girl nearby told me to float on my back. From the side of the pool my mother watched and listened. In a fraction of a second she was out of her chair and headed for the pool. Mom’s broomstick skirt billowed out like a hot air balloon as she leaped through the air toward the liquid surface. From the other edge of the pool a fully dressed man ran toward the water and jumped into the pool. My father swam toward my mother and I.

My mother and the unknown older girl pushed me to the side of the pool. My father reached my mother and pushed her to the edge. Hands pulled and pushed me onto the cement surface surrounding the pool. More hands pulled my mother onto the surface and then gently lowered her into a lounge chair. The pool was empty of it’s previous occupants. Somebody looked at me and said, “she’s OK.” People gathered around my mother touching her and looking at her. Finally someone announced, “she’s in shock.” I wondered what it meant that my mother was, “in shock.” She was really just dripping wet. Nothing electric had touched my mother. Now that I am a mom and grandma I know my mom also felt humiliated with all the attention.

The following summer I was signed up for swimming lessons. The lessons went well until test day. I was not afraid of the water as long as I knew where the bottom was and that I could touch it with my feet while my head remained out of the water. I did very well making the strokes and kicks that were taught in class. I did not expect to get the Intermediate card at the end of class. I was not going to swim in the deep water. I blubbered and reasoned with my sweet patient teacher that I could NOT take the test. Maybe I could just do the same thing in shallow water. Finally my teacher said something that changed the outcome of my test as well as my outlook on many things later in my life. She said, “ I’ll go with you.” As I reached the deep water I looked over at her and she said, “ I’m here.” I received my Intermediate Swimmer Card.

During the rest of the summer I swam in the deep end at the pool and even plunged off the high diving board many times. Sad to say, I forgot the name of that swimming instructor but I have remembered her as one of my best teachers. The important lessons she taught me were not in the Red Cross Swimming Instructor’s lesson guide. These lessons were: many times in life there are things we cannot do alone and we must accept help to succeed. When we fail we must try again. There are times that someone else will need me to swim beside them in deep water just like my teacher did for me. I need to watch for opportunities to help.

There were other lessons that I learned when reflecting on this experience. I thought of how my mother and father sat by the pool and watched and listened for me. When they saw and heard me in trouble they acted for my safety. God is like that. He watches and waits for us. It reminds me that those who do not know Him as Savior can call on Him to save them. God's Word says that God demonstrated His love toward us that when we were still sinners Christ died for us. (Romans 5:8) As sinners we are like I was as a drowning victim. I thought I was good enough and that I had the skill to swim but I was not. God even tells us in His Word that all our good deeds in life (rightousness) are like filthy rags. He says what we do (good works, going to church etc.) comes short of the standard we would need to meet (the glory of God) to come to HIM. I couldn't save myself. God wants us to recognize that we need His help and He wants us to call on Him. He is waiting and watching for that call and He will answer and rescue whoever calls on His name.

When I think of my mother and father jumping into the pool it seems like an example of Christ who saw I was helpless but did not think of Himself. My parents humiliated themselves to save me. They only thought of saving me, not the embarassment and spectacle of two fully dressed people jumping in the pool. They loved me. The Lord Jesus Christ, God's only Son became a man on earth and came into a scene where He was humiliated. First He was born in a humble place, a cave where animals were housed. He had no place He called home as He walked among men during His early ministry. He was unjustly arrested and tried. Think of the humiliation of being beaten, spit upon, mocked and hung naked on a wooden cross to endure a horrible death when He was pure and holy and had done nothing to deserve what He bore for the sins of the world which included ME and YOU. He endured this humility willingly because God's Word says He loves us.

If we already know Him as our Lord and Savior He has promised to answer us when we call. Call unto me and I will answer you and show you great and mighty things that you do not know. Jerimiah 33:3 (NAS) My teacher swimming beside me reminds me how God sent The Holy Spirit to be with us always. Whatever deep water we go through He is constantly with us. When we are frightend we need only to look to God for courage. In Joshua 1:9 God tells us, "Have I not commanded you? Be strong and courageous. Do not be afraid; do not be discouraged, for The Lord your God will be with you wherever you go."

When this event happened I was not aware of the deeper lessons that God would open to me later in life. I was only twelve years old. I only understood a little. As my life moved on, God in His goodness showed me lessons through what had happened earlier in my life that had a scriptural application. God can do that. He can make the cloudy clear and change the darkness into light. He is good, all the time, in shallow or deep water, in sun or in storm. He is faithful and He is a God who loves. Praise Him Always.

Marjournal Notes: Hang It Ups

Marjournal Notes: Hang It Ups